Walking through the door Dr. King kicked down

This young lady, Tamia Gaines, makes some great points about creating the world we want to live in. Have we helped create the world that Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. dreamed of? This video is a wonderful resource for parents when explaining what we are celebrating today. The best thing we can do is to get up and help others in memory of one of the greatest men in our history.

Have a great day!

-Ang

Guilty Pleasures

Why oh why do I love silly reality shows? Probably because they are the furthest thing from my reality and most of these people are so whack that it makes me feel really good about myself. OK...all kidding aside. Millionaire Matchmaker...genius. Deadliest Catch...perfection. But my latest obesession...wait for it...wait for it...is Storage Wars!

It doesn't have the emotional depth of matchmaker or the complex relationships of DC, but the lottery-like suspense of each storage unit is quite gratifying. Add that to the unspoken complexity of the people who abandon these treasure troves and it all equals one gratifying hour of reality tv.

That reminds me...I need to go see who gets Chopped.

Photo Break

It's killing me that I don't have any new pictures up from the snow today...technical difficulties. So here are the kids on the hunt for our Christmas tree last month. It was an amazing day!

NeedLess Challenge of the Week

Reconnect.

With a friend...with a child...with your spouse...or even with yourself.

Take time this week to evaluate those relationships you value most and reconnect. If it is a difficult situation that needs more time then just start thinking about the possibility of reconnecting.

I have friends that I haven't seen or talked to (real life chat...not facebook chat) in years. Don't get me wrong. I dig facebook for catching up with old friends and keeping up with current friends...but there is nothing better than reconnecting with an old friend. I did it last summer in NYC and I hope to do it this weekend in OKC. There are just certain people that make my life richer and I need to focus on nurturing those relationships...and letting go of the ones that don't.

Connection is what it's all about! So reach out and let me know how it goes!

-Ang

Sprinkle - High, Low, Ha!

Years ago I saw a movie that I can't even remember the name of - Michelle Pfeiffer was in it I think - but there was one part that stayed with me. At dinner each night the family would share their "high, low" of the day. It served as a springboard for conversations that got the kids thinking beyond "what did you do today?" So ever since my kids could speak we have been playing high, low, ha! Sometimes in the car after I pick them up from school, but most often during dinner, we each share the best thing that happened that day, the worst thing that happened that day and the funniest thing that happened that day.

It's not perfect. Sometimes the kids talk all over each other and argue about who gets to go first, but I love it...it's most often my high!

Just Two Little Words...

"It's snowing!" Two words we rarely hear in Dallas, but I love it! The kids are rushing through the house yelling and planning what they will do when it finally accumulates. Yesterday we bought carrots at the grocery store in anticipation of the snow - a must-have for any dignified snow man - but I honestly thought I would be throwing them in this week's pot of veggie soup.

"But it's here! It's finally here!" My sweet Lu just exclaimed. So off to help prepare the kids for this rare Texas treat. Pictures coming soon!

-Ang

NeedLess Approval

What's normal? And who even says normal anymore without putting the "finger quotes" around it? Normal is the definition of what is socially acceptable to a certain set of people, right? So you work to find friends who have the same normal as you or you find a normal you aspire to achieve and then hide your realities in order to fit in. (FYI...The first option is the healthier of the two.)

I remember the first time I heard the saying "you are only as sick as your secrets" and I thought what in the world are they talking about? No one knows my secrets, therefore no one knows I am sick. My ambition in life was to work as hard as I could to get the approval of others in order for them not to see... that inside I was really a mess.

It was a dangerous addiction...yes, I said addiction. Approval addiction is alive and well in the lives of many people. Think about it...so many problems we have as a society comes from trying to get the approval of others.

As a teenager, I would do things that I knew were dangerous, or against my own internal compass, in order to receive the approval of others. As a young adult, I would buy things that I couldn't afford in order to receive social approval. And as a woman, I used to work myself to the bone to be the best fill in the blank (mom, employee, wife, friend, daughter) I knew. You see, I was self-medicating because I was unknowingly suffering from depression. I would actually get a high from the approval of others and that would help me "cope" with the self-loathing internal dialogue that constantly ran in my head.

I thought if I could keep my friends at arm's length then they would never know the real me. The problem was when you push people away you tend to lose friends. Never because of a big blow out (well, ok, maybe once) but mostly my friendships have simply faded away. I didn't want to do the work on myself in order reciprocate any kind of intimacy, but that all changed in the fall of 2008.

My life fell apart and as I started rebuilding I learned that living an authentic life was the only way I was going to survive. So slowly and surely, I have made my way out of the clouds of depression. Sure, I still have down days and I still struggle sometimes with approval addiction; but I am able to recognize it and remove myself from the situation before I say, do, or buy something I will regret.

NeedLess Deal of the Week

One of my resolutions is to spend more time with the hubby, but I also don't want to bust the budget. I am determined to have date nights for $100 or less (including babysitter). Sound impossible? Well, check out this week's deal at restaurant.com - purchase $25 gift certificates for $5 each.

We used a gift certificate from restaurant.com a few weeks ago while we were in Austin and it was great! A $25 gift certificate for $5. There are restrictions to using the gift certificate - you can only use one per visit and they automatically include the tip based on your total prior to applying the gift certificate and they aren't available everywhere...but other than that, they're awesome!

Happy Date Night!!!

What does it mean to be NeedLess?

Being NeedLess doesn't mean being complacent. It just means reframing your current situation in order to live authentically today...not tomorrow, not yesterday, but right now. The goal is to be the best version of yourself with what you have at this very moment.

Back on the Blogging Train!

"Even if you are on the right track, you will get run over if you just sit
there." - Will Rogers

Maybe it's the Oklahoma girl in me or maybe it's because my little boy adores trains or maybe it's because I can relate to what it feels like to be run over - whatever it is - this quote resonates with me today.

I feel like I was on the right track for a while, but lately I feel as though I have been left at the station collecting dust. I know, I know...the New Year is full of resolutions that most people forget by Valentine's day, but this year I resolve to take care of myself. That's it - nothing earth shattering - just evaluate what's working and what's not and make the necessary changes I need in order to be the best me I can be.

The last two years have been completely life altering. On December 8, 2008, I went back to work full-time after being a stay-at-home mom for over 5 years. It was like being shot out of a cannon. Friends ask me all of the time, "Which is harder- staying at home or working?" And I answer it like I answer most comparisons - "it depends." For me it is easier to go to work every day because of the financial uncertainty we had as a family with two young entrepreneurs. But the mommy guilt can get pretty intense sometimes. Balance is the key.

So that's where I am today - trying to balance the demands of being a wife, a working mother of three young kids and not lose myself in a sea of unrealistic expectations. I think I can, I think I can, I think I can...