"It's snowing!" Two words we rarely hear in Dallas, but I love it! The kids are rushing through the house yelling and planning what they will do when it finally accumulates. Yesterday we bought carrots at the grocery store in anticipation of the snow - a must-have for any dignified snow man - but I honestly thought I would be throwing them in this week's pot of veggie soup.
"But it's here! It's finally here!" My sweet Lu just exclaimed. So off to help prepare the kids for this rare Texas treat. Pictures coming soon!
-Ang
Sunday, January 9, 2011
Saturday, January 8, 2011
NeedLess Approval
What's normal? And who even says normal anymore without putting the "finger quotes" around it? Normal is the definition of what is socially acceptable to a certain set of people, right? So you work to find friends who have the same normal as you or you find a normal you aspire to achieve and then hide your realities in order to fit in. (FYI...The first option is the healthier of the two.)
I remember the first time I heard the saying "you are only as sick as your secrets" and I thought what in the world are they talking about? No one knows my secrets, therefore no one knows I am sick. My ambition in life was to work as hard as I could to get the approval of others in order for them not to see... that inside I was really a mess.
It was a dangerous addiction...yes, I said addiction. Approval addiction is alive and well in the lives of many people. Think about it...so many problems we have as a society comes from trying to get the approval of others.
As a teenager, I would do things that I knew were dangerous, or against my own internal compass, in order to receive the approval of others. As a young adult, I would buy things that I couldn't afford in order to receive social approval. And as a woman, I used to work myself to the bone to be the best fill in the blank (mom, employee, wife, friend, daughter) I knew. You see, I was self-medicating because I was unknowingly suffering from depression. I would actually get a high from the approval of others and that would help me "cope" with the self-loathing internal dialogue that constantly ran in my head.
I thought if I could keep my friends at arm's length then they would never know the real me. The problem was when you push people away you tend to lose friends. Never because of a big blow out (well, ok, maybe once) but mostly my friendships have simply faded away. I didn't want to do the work on myself in order reciprocate any kind of intimacy, but that all changed in the fall of 2008.
My life fell apart and as I started rebuilding I learned that living an authentic life was the only way I was going to survive. So slowly and surely, I have made my way out of the clouds of depression. Sure, I still have down days and I still struggle sometimes with approval addiction; but I am able to recognize it and remove myself from the situation before I say, do, or buy something I will regret.
I remember the first time I heard the saying "you are only as sick as your secrets" and I thought what in the world are they talking about? No one knows my secrets, therefore no one knows I am sick. My ambition in life was to work as hard as I could to get the approval of others in order for them not to see... that inside I was really a mess.
It was a dangerous addiction...yes, I said addiction. Approval addiction is alive and well in the lives of many people. Think about it...so many problems we have as a society comes from trying to get the approval of others.
As a teenager, I would do things that I knew were dangerous, or against my own internal compass, in order to receive the approval of others. As a young adult, I would buy things that I couldn't afford in order to receive social approval. And as a woman, I used to work myself to the bone to be the best fill in the blank (mom, employee, wife, friend, daughter) I knew. You see, I was self-medicating because I was unknowingly suffering from depression. I would actually get a high from the approval of others and that would help me "cope" with the self-loathing internal dialogue that constantly ran in my head.
I thought if I could keep my friends at arm's length then they would never know the real me. The problem was when you push people away you tend to lose friends. Never because of a big blow out (well, ok, maybe once) but mostly my friendships have simply faded away. I didn't want to do the work on myself in order reciprocate any kind of intimacy, but that all changed in the fall of 2008.
My life fell apart and as I started rebuilding I learned that living an authentic life was the only way I was going to survive. So slowly and surely, I have made my way out of the clouds of depression. Sure, I still have down days and I still struggle sometimes with approval addiction; but I am able to recognize it and remove myself from the situation before I say, do, or buy something I will regret.
Monday, January 3, 2011
NeedLess Deal of the Week
One of my resolutions is to spend more time with the hubby, but I also don't want to bust the budget. I am determined to have date nights for $100 or less (including babysitter). Sound impossible? Well, check out this week's deal at restaurant.com - purchase $25 gift certificates for $5 each.
We used a gift certificate from restaurant.com a few weeks ago while we were in Austin and it was great! A $25 gift certificate for $5. There are restrictions to using the gift certificate - you can only use one per visit and they automatically include the tip based on your total prior to applying the gift certificate and they aren't available everywhere...but other than that, they're awesome!
Happy Date Night!!!
We used a gift certificate from restaurant.com a few weeks ago while we were in Austin and it was great! A $25 gift certificate for $5. There are restrictions to using the gift certificate - you can only use one per visit and they automatically include the tip based on your total prior to applying the gift certificate and they aren't available everywhere...but other than that, they're awesome!
Happy Date Night!!!
What does it mean to be NeedLess?
Being NeedLess doesn't mean being complacent. It just means reframing your current situation in order to live authentically today...not tomorrow, not yesterday, but right now. The goal is to be the best version of yourself with what you have at this very moment.
Sunday, January 2, 2011
Back on the Blogging Train!
"Even if you are on the right track, you will get run over if you just sit
there." - Will Rogers
Maybe it's the Oklahoma girl in me or maybe it's because my little boy adores trains or maybe it's because I can relate to what it feels like to be run over - whatever it is - this quote resonates with me today.
I feel like I was on the right track for a while, but lately I feel as though I have been left at the station collecting dust. I know, I know...the New Year is full of resolutions that most people forget by Valentine's day, but this year I resolve to take care of myself. That's it - nothing earth shattering - just evaluate what's working and what's not and make the necessary changes I need in order to be the best me I can be.
The last two years have been completely life altering. On December 8, 2008, I went back to work full-time after being a stay-at-home mom for over 5 years. It was like being shot out of a cannon. Friends ask me all of the time, "Which is harder- staying at home or working?" And I answer it like I answer most comparisons - "it depends." For me it is easier to go to work every day because of the financial uncertainty we had as a family with two young entrepreneurs. But the mommy guilt can get pretty intense sometimes. Balance is the key.
So that's where I am today - trying to balance the demands of being a wife, a working mother of three young kids and not lose myself in a sea of unrealistic expectations. I think I can, I think I can, I think I can...
Monday, January 19, 2009
Martin Luther King Jr.
Check out this video! AWESOME!
http://www.metacafe.com/watch/1194962/john_legend_performs_pride_in_the_name_of_love/
I dig MLK Jr. and everything that he accomplished. I have to admit growing up, I really didn't get it. So I am trying to show my kids how different America was just a couple of generations ago. There are so many wonderful children's books that help them understand that we are "different but the same." And I LOVE that. I feel that the purpose of my life is to reach out to others and share what gifts I have to offer. I may not be able to change the world through politics or writing a best seller, but I can make some homeless people tuna sandwiches, or take portraits for at-risk children, or even just be an example of God's love in the lives of my children.
Mother Theresa once wrote that if we all just swept our own front porches, then this world would be a better place. So start at home. TODAY! Go grab your kids or friends or husband or cat and do something for someone else. Teach them that there is a world that needs them and that they are valuable right now. We are going to make Valentine's today. Someone in our church is going to deliver them to people in Hospice care in a few weeks. I am not telling you this to toot our horn, I am just telling you this so you can know how simple it can be. Pick something and make a difference on this day!
"by all means...keep moving!"
http://www.metacafe.com/watch/1194962/john_legend_performs_pride_in_the_name_of_love/
I dig MLK Jr. and everything that he accomplished. I have to admit growing up, I really didn't get it. So I am trying to show my kids how different America was just a couple of generations ago. There are so many wonderful children's books that help them understand that we are "different but the same." And I LOVE that. I feel that the purpose of my life is to reach out to others and share what gifts I have to offer. I may not be able to change the world through politics or writing a best seller, but I can make some homeless people tuna sandwiches, or take portraits for at-risk children, or even just be an example of God's love in the lives of my children.
Mother Theresa once wrote that if we all just swept our own front porches, then this world would be a better place. So start at home. TODAY! Go grab your kids or friends or husband or cat and do something for someone else. Teach them that there is a world that needs them and that they are valuable right now. We are going to make Valentine's today. Someone in our church is going to deliver them to people in Hospice care in a few weeks. I am not telling you this to toot our horn, I am just telling you this so you can know how simple it can be. Pick something and make a difference on this day!
"by all means...keep moving!"
Depression Stinks
I have been in a serious funk. In November, my life took me by my feet, turned me upside down and shook the rest of what I had left tucked into my pockets onto the floor. It has been a seriously tough few years, but that was it. I hit my rock bottom and decided to get help. It is very personal and I don't want to go into it until I get my mini-series deal about my life, but just know that I am on the way back and I apologize for anything I may or may not have done.
Sometimes, we can get in our own ways. The dialogue that goes through my head is tougher than anything I would ever say out loud. I am my own worst enemy...wait, did I just quote Pink? That may have to be my new low. Anyway, I just don't get it? Why I have to continue to learn the same lessons over and over again.
BUT...I am back to blogging. I find it cathartic to share my thoughts with others. And I think I am to a place now that I won't be spreading the funk. But rather I am taking it day by day and learning who I want to be and finally let go of all of those expectations of others.
Music helps...so go create a "happy" station on http://www.pandora.com/.
Have a great day!
Sometimes, we can get in our own ways. The dialogue that goes through my head is tougher than anything I would ever say out loud. I am my own worst enemy...wait, did I just quote Pink? That may have to be my new low. Anyway, I just don't get it? Why I have to continue to learn the same lessons over and over again.
BUT...I am back to blogging. I find it cathartic to share my thoughts with others. And I think I am to a place now that I won't be spreading the funk. But rather I am taking it day by day and learning who I want to be and finally let go of all of those expectations of others.
Music helps...so go create a "happy" station on http://www.pandora.com/.
Have a great day!
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